07.30.08

An Inconvenient Truth

Posted in Gridiron, The World Of Entertainment at 5:24 am by

(inventor of the internet AFL, Al Gore)

Win a major pro or college championship, you meet the President. Win the ArenaBowl…

“It’s amazing how many people have texted, or e-mailed or called,” [Philadephia Soul co-owner Jon Bon Jovi] said. “Coach [Tom] Coughlin from the Giants, Andy Reid, Bill Belichick, Bob Kraft, [Doug] Flutie, [John] Elway, Al Gore. You’d be surprised at the people who were glued to their TV Sunday. Charlie Weis.

[Bon Jovi] said after Sunday’s game that the concert he promised if the Soul won the championship would be held before next season’s opener.

Does that mean the “free” concert requires purchase of a game ticket? Or is it just going to be “sometime before” next season’s opener, at somewhere other than the Wachovia Center?

Paging Stephen Bochco…

Posted in "Wife Beater" Is Not A Fashion Statement, Baseball, Greedy Motherfuckers, The Law at 3:59 am by

You might want to get on this for your new show before Dick Wolf does. According to the Associated Press, former Seattle Mariners (and not-quite-Phillies and Giants) reliever Julio Mateo, now with Fresno of the PCL, was arrested on suspicion of forgery after paying for a cab in Albuquerque using a counterfeit $100 bill.


Mateo had previously faced domestic violence charges from an incident in New York City, which he eventually pled guilty to. I’m now thinking he got nabbed for that because somebody asked him, “Julio, when did you stop beating your wife?”

According to police reports, as officers patted Mateo down in a hotel hallway early Sunday, he made a statement in Spanish to police that translates to, “I didn’t pass the bad money.”

“Before officers informed him of why we were there, Julio stated that he did not know anything about fake money,” Officer Christopher Enyart wrote in a police report….

After investigating officers received permission from Mateo to enter his hotel room, an officer saw “two stacks [of] money with $100 bills on top of the stacks,” a police report said.

The Secret To Carlos Delgado’s Success

Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism at 1:06 am by

Mets 1B Carlos Delgado continued his recent turn-back-the-clock routine Tuesday night, hitting an 8th inning, 2-run HR off the Marlins’ Renyel Pinto, a key blow in New York’s 4-1 victory. Since June 27, Delgado’s clobbered 13 home runs and accumulated 25 RBI’s. He’s also seen his batting average rise from .232 to .262, his OPS increasing by more than 100 points, a stunning turnaround that’s caused many observers to wonder how they should properly account for this career resurrection.  Has Delgado finally recovered from his wrist and hip woes?  Has Willie Randolph’s departure been something of a relief?  Or could this be Carlos D’s personal crusade to make one Long Island-based columnist look silly?   If you picked “C”, surely Newsday’s Ken Davidoff deserves consideration for a Mets playoff share by virtue of penning the following on June 28, the day after Delgado hit 3 HR’s at Yankee Stadium.

Game 1 will go down as a memorable aberration in this downward slope of Delgado’s career bell curve, rather than serving as a springboard for the 36-year-old’s revival; he went 0-for-2 with two walks in the Mets’ 9-0 Game 2 loss to Sidney Ponson, of all people.

Come season’s end, Delgado’s statistics might look decent, the product of a few more binges. But that he’ll leave the Mets, nonetheless, trailed by a cloud of disappointment.

Mets fans have taken on Delgado this year as much for his body language as his stats. The way he barely seems to move on balls hit in his vicinity. The way his shoulders slump after a strikeout. He seems to be a different guy from the freethinking, note-taking, ball-raking leader who first came here in 2006.

Wright, always the optimist, praised his teammate. Said Wright: “He’s a guy that, when he gets hot, he gets stupid hot. He can be one of the best run-producers in the league.”

Maybe. Probably not. But for one glorious afternoon in the Bronx, at least, Delgado entered his personal time tunnel, padded his impressive resume and won the Mets a ballgame.

Dick Justice On The Rockets’ Tarnished 2009 NBA Championship

Posted in Basketball at 12:13 am by

As you’ve probably heard elsewhere, Houston have reunited Rick Adelman with Ron Artest, acquiring the Tru Warier for the price of Bobby Jackson, Donte Green and a future draft pick.  A disillusioned Richard Justice, blogging for the Houston Chronicle, concedes, “if the Rockets win a championship–and they’re good enough if Tracy McGrady and Yao Ming stay healthy and Morey makes a move to upgrade point guard–no one will care how they did it. No one will mention that the franchise suddenly seems diminished.

He’s a wonderfully talented basketball player. He’s only 29 years old. He did a terrific job with the Kings on the court. But there’s a reason this is his fourth team. Not every team has considered Ron Artest worth the trouble.

Rick Adelman coached Artest for 40 games, so he certainly signed off on the deal. I want to trust Rick Adelman in personnel matters. I want to trust Daryl Morey, too. This is a tough one to swallow.

It could be another example of Les Alexander pretending to be a general manager. His last good idea was wanting Steve Francis back in uniform. That one should have taught him to stick with stocks and bonds and whatever else he does. He doesn’t know basketball.

We’ll eventually know whether Les forced this deal on his basketball team. It may be two or three years down the line, but someone will let it slip. They always do.

The Rockets had pursued Artest in the past even after he’d gotten into trouble. In an odd twist, once he was accused of animal cruelty, Artest seemed to disappear from the hearts and minds of the Rockets.

Come to think of it, if you can forgive Artest for all the other stuff he has done, you should be able to forgive him for neglecting an animal.

Justice lists “attacking a fan” as part of Artest’s rap sheet, neglecting to mention said fan precipitated the assault by throwing a full cup of beer .  Indeed, there are many reasons why Artest is on his 4th franchise.  But since we’re on the subject, Tracy McGrady is a trade away from having played for just as many. If Artest’s reputation precedes him, how about T-Mac’s coach killing history?

07.29.08

Write Your Own Big Red Machine Punch Line : Fire Joe Morgan Banned In China

Posted in Baseball, Blogged Down, Free Expression, olympics, The Internet, We Aren't The World at 11:47 pm by

Despite prior assurances that journalists covering the Summer Olympics would have unfettered internet access, CNET reports there’s a number of sites being blocked, including Amnesty International and urls that include “Tibet”. But it’s not just Current 93 loving sports scribes who are SOOL, writes the Rocky Mountain News’ Daniel Oshinsky, as it seems Chinese authorities frown on public criticism of a certain “Moneyball”-bashing former second baseman.

I am not sure why this is the case.  Maybe the Chinese government wants to hide the link between high BABIP and overinflated batting averages.  Maybe they’re against those who lurk in their mother’s basement, thumbing through the dusty box scores in old editions of Sporting News.  Maybe they just like Murray Chass’ new website.

Whatever the reason, here’s an open call for the Chinese government to unblock Fire Joe Morgan.  The good people of China deserve to know what inane things the American baseball media are saying.

One Sad Individual’s Virtual Assault On Carlos Beltran

Posted in Baseball, Video Games at 7:51 pm by

While a 6th inning RBI single off Scott Olsen by Carlos Beltran has the Mets leading the Fish, 2-1, not every New Yorker is enamored with the Mets’ centerfielder.

Shocking stuff, eh?  You’d think Chris Russo could afford a maid.

At Least He Lasted Longer Than Rush Limbaugh

Posted in Gridiron, Sports TV at 7:31 pm by

Newsday’s Neil Best reported earlier today that Emmit Smith has been replaced by Chris Carter on the set for ESPN’s “Sunday NFL Countdown”, charitably describing the former Cowboys RB as an announcer who “struggled at times to speak English clearly”. With this historic announcement in mind, let’s (again) turn back to last November, when the Fort Worth Star-Telegram’s Gary West annointed Emmitt as “the media™s MPP —most painful person to watch/hear.”

As an ESPN football analyst, Smith is conspicuously inept. No, to call him inept insults inept people: He™s woefully incompetent. But here™s the important question: What does his presence say about the network that put him there?

As one of the analysts on NFL Countdown, Smith babbles, bumbles and stutters while generally insulting the language. He sometimes fumbles his facts and frequently seems unprepared. He can™t even get a cliché right.About Green Bay™s Donald Driver, Smith said: œTonight he™s looking to get back to paydirt so he can right size the ship right now.

About the Cowboys™ quarterback, Smith said: œTony Romo has the mentality to have the sense to make the play.

When asked to summarize his thoughts in two words, he once said, œCowboys lose big-time.

And about this season™s grand possibilities, Smith said, œIf you want to stay perfect, you can not go undefeated with a blemish on your record.