(“…and you’re boring, too.”)

Newcastle exile Craig Bellamy, who scored over the weekend for Celtic in the Old Firm derby, saved his most impresive performance in recent memory for his mobile phone. From Brian McNally and Euan Stretch in last Sunday’s Mirror.

Soccer bad boy Craig Bellamy sent a series of abusive text messages to his old Newcastle captain Alan Shearer after going on a bender at a charity golf tournament.

Ex-England striker Shearer, 34, was left “visibly shaken” and “seething” after being taunted by former team-mate Bellamy, 25.

Shearer got the messages just minutes after his team’s 4-1 defeat against Manchester United in the FA Cup semi-final last Sunday. They included insults: “Your legs are gone. You’re too old. You’re too slow.”

Another – which made him “turn purple with rage” – reportedly read: “You couldn’t even kiss my a**e.”

Yesterday a source close to Newcastle Utd said: “Shearer walked into the dressing room and switched on his phone.

“He looked distraught as he checked his messages.

“Bellamy was clearly delighted that Newcastle had been knocked out of the cup.

“He also sent texts to several other players and Kenneth Shepherd, son of the Newcastle chairman.

“But it is the final one to Shearer that has enraged the players – and I don’t think Newcastle fans will be happy about it either.”

The source added: “Shearer is worshipped as a god in Tyneside.

“There is no way Bellamy could show his face around these parts after what he texted.”

It is not the first time fiery Welsh international Bellamy has sent abusive text messages to Shearer. He has also targeted other fellow professionals and managers.

Earlier this year he left an offensive voicemail message on Shearer’s phone and sent him a text calling him “F****** goody two shoes.”

And he sent abusive texts to Newcastle manager Graham Souness and chairman Freddy Shepherd when they tried to sell him to Birmingham for £6million. It read: “I am Craig Bellamy and I don’t sign for s*** football clubs.”