From Fledgling Scott Bore-Ass To Dubiously Coiffed, Nu-Age Ambulance Chaser – Heitner’s Big Epiphany

Posted in The Law, The Marketplace at 8:42 pm by

Given the number of times Darren Heitner — he of the self posted/edited Wiki entries, feeble analysis and bold attempts to represent the lower rungs of the pro bowling circuit — has appeared in this space, surely someone out there is curious what’s happening in Darren’s exciting life.  Hello?  Anybody?

OK, if you’ve not been following Master Heitner’s career trajectory of late, you might missed out on this morning’s blog post, alerting his adoring public (“My Jerry Maguire-esque Moment?”) that from this day forward, he’s no longer an agent.

My decision will allow me to expand my current offerings and enter into new lines of business that excite and inspire me.  First of all, Sports Agent Blog will continue to exist and will be updated with the same frequency.  In fact, my relinquishing of the title of “sports agent” should permit further growth of Sports Agent Blog, as many practicing sports agents who currently believe that I am conflicted by running this site in conjunction with representing athletes may put such fears aside.  I look forward to contributing to this website from a completely non-biased position.  In addition to Sports Agent Blog, I occasionally post legal related articles on ChangeLegal.com (mostly related to intellectual property) and very recently created Sport-in-Law, which I believe has major potential to be the go-to website for everything “Sports Law.”

I have been practicing law for roughly a year-and-a-half and have focused my efforts on intellectual property and other types of civil litigation in addition to having a nice sized practice dealing with transactional work.  A majority of my files involve either entertainment, music, or sports related matters.  Recently, I have been working with a handful of sports agencies as their general counsel, assisting them with contract drafting/review and litigation.  With my knowledge of sports law coupled with my experiences in the world of sports agency, I believe I have a unique ability to assist agencies in the aforementioned areas in addition to salary arbitration, sport-specific grievances, and other related matters.  Removing the stigma that is attached to being a sports agent while trying to grow my practice in these areas will hopefully allow my practice to reach entirely new levels.

Though I’d certainly be out of place offering my own uninformed opinions about entertainment law, might there be less of a stigma associated with representing professional athletes than say, pimping for the staff of one’s local Hooter’s? Either way, Heitner’s agency, Dynasty Athlete Representation, has been re-dubbed, “Dynasty Dealings”, and the former man in charge promises whatever remaining jai lai players and/or web models who might need his sage input, “I will still work with many athletes and entertainers, but as an attorney and/or consultant, and not as an agent.”

2 responses to “From Fledgling Scott Bore-Ass To Dubiously Coiffed, Nu-Age Ambulance Chaser – Heitner’s Big Epiphany”

  1. Wally says:

    Here is what I don’t understand. If the subject is a nobody, why do you continue to cover him and read his blog? Just sayin..

  2. GC says:

    “If the subject is a nobody, why do you continue to cover him and read his blog?”

    First of all, I didn’t call him a nobody. He’s absolutely somebody — one of the biggest schmucks alive, in fact.

    I do not profess to being a regular reader of his blog —- though if you’d like to volunteer to provide monthly updates on the highlights, I’m sure we can make it a regular feature. But why would I go out of my way to occasionally ridicule this sap? In a world full of horrors routine and otherwise, it’s called comic relief. If this blog fails to make you laugh every now and then, I’m sure you’ll find another that does that trick.

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