Pats Sign Diminutive Backup QB

Posted in Gridiron at 3:29 pm by

In a move designed to cheer sentimentalists and yack-radio screamers alike, the New England Patriots have signed 42 year old Doug Flutie to a one-year deal to serve as their insurance policy in case Tom Brady contracts a deadly STD.

Said deal wipes out any hopes of the NY Giants to reunite Flutie with General Tom Coughlin, his former offensive coordinator / QB coach during the former’s salad days at BC. When Bill Belichick is the happy personality by comparison, you know you’ve got problems.

Framingham, MA city planners immediately announced that the shopping mall access road Flutie Pass would henceforth be known as “Flutie Clipboard”.

Rumors that the Celtics plan to active Marvin Barnes in time for Game 4 of their first round playoff series with the Pacers, are unfounded.

2 responses to “Pats Sign Diminutive Backup QB”

  1. palefire says:

    Or Marvin Webster….
    The real question is what is is going on with this newly lax attitude re CSTB? It’s been, like, almost twelve hours since the last post. And what about this thing called the NBA Playoffs? Doesn’t this warrent a mention more than once every two or three days at this stage of the season?

  2. CSTB says:

    re : slow posts. There have been some server issues this week, followed by a powerbook going D.O.A. (and I don’t mean it turned into Joey Shithead). I’ve also had some business travel, my foot hurts (the one I type with) and I’m too busy reading the fake baseball tonight blog (and trying not to laugh so hard that I vomit cereal all over the spare laptop, thus making future posts even less likely to appear in a timely manner).

    Still, I’m having a better week than Frank Francisco.


    re : NBA playoffs. y’know, I’m guilty of letting the side down. I end being transfixed by regular season baseball far more than these playoffs, which is not a commentary on the worth of the latter, just my own preference. Nets/Heat game 3 was fun (if you’re Jimmy Buffet), and game 2 of the Suns/Grizzlies series was wild enough for a 1 vs. an 8 seed.

    and color me surprised at the way Boston folded to Indy the other night. Given how old and banged up the Pacers are, I really thought the younger, faster Celtics would win this series in 5 or 6. I don’t wanna say that Doc Rivers is being outcoached by Rick Carlise….so I’ll just write it, instead.

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