(possibly a favorite tract in the Carr household)

David Carr might be starting for Carolina today against Tampa Bay in place of Jake Delhomme, and much to the amazement of the Charlotte Observer’s Tom Sorensen, the former Houston Texan claims he neither drinks nor swears.

Have you ever had a beer?

“I have, yeah,” Carr says earlier this week, his street clothes coordinated black and white from his cap to his shoes. “But probably when I was younger. I did a lot of things when I was younger that I was not supposed to do. But I have three boys now (sons Austin, Tyler and Cooper). It’s just not me.”

The lack of alcohol I can understand. The lack of profanity is difficult to grasp.

What if a receiver runs the wrong route today and, even with the black glove, the pass is intercepted?

“As far as dog cussing guys, life is too short for that,” says Carr. “It’s not something I’d go out and make a point of.”

What if an enemy player such as Tampa Bay linebacker Derrick Brooks hits you long after you release the ball?

“I’d get hot, I’d get hot,” says Carr. “But I know Derrick and if he did he’d probably have a reason for it. He hits the 3-wood a long way and we’d probably talk about it when we play golf in the offseason.”

I’m not giving up here. What if a really mean player who can’t hit a 3-wood and lacks a good reason for hitting you late hits you anyway?

“I’d have something to say, but I couldn’t tell you right now because I’m not in that mindset,” says Carr.

Can you conceive of becoming so angry that you swear at him?

“Probably not,” says Carr.