“I did curse…” admits Dallas TE Martellus Bennett, referencing his since-removed YooToob clip that managed to rhyme “Romo” with “homo”. “…but I didn’t steal a hearse.” And with that, I think we can agree that a) Bennett has not been accused of stealing a hearse, and b) the sports blogosphere and the producers of several ESPN programs that feature men shouting eagerly await the day he does steal a hearse.