(the happy young men of Chaminade get a head start on a lifetime of sexual repression)

Newsday’s Meredith Daniels reports that an Long Island all-boys catholic High School has cancelled their junior and senior proms.

“The question comes down to the toxic culture of the prom that just can’t be reformed,” said Father James Williams, President of Chaminade High School. “It’s all the over-the-topness that takes place — who has the biggest limo, who has the most elaborate weekend planned — that the prom is no longer the focus.” “Plus, all the post-prom events usually include drinking and other illegal activities.”

The “trappings of excess in American culture” was the reasoning behind Kellenberg Memorial High School’s September announcement according to Brother Kenneth Hoagland, their school principal.

“Years ago when teenagers went to a prom, they had a formal dance and maybe went to someone’s home for breakfast. Now it’s become a whole weekend affair where teenagers spend thousands of dollars and become pressured by peers to engage in sexual activities and drinking,” said Father Williams.

Though I’m sure Williams and Hoagland could vouch for the atmosphere at an all-boys school being 100% non-toxic (sounds effects of a loud coughing fit), if they think pulling the plug on a stupid prom is going to stop kids from fucking, I’ve got a Topps Ed Meese rookie card I’d like to sell them.