(“And what are you wearing?”)

Which is the more fascinating subject, England’s forthcoming World Cup qualifier with Wales (Sept. 3) or manager Sven Goran Eriksson’s zipper problem? The oversexed Swede would prefer that we not pay much attention to the latter, writes the Times’ Matt Dickinson.

œI think it™s fair that the critics are hard when you lose a football game like we lost in Denmark, Eriksson said. œOn non-football issues, I™m sorry to read weekend after weekend rubbish, things that aren™t true. Obviously someone is out there trying to disturb my job.

œBut if they think they can disturb the harmony in the England team they are totally wrong. If people are to write about my private life they should at least try to make it right. Is that asking too much to write the truth? Someone is out there trying to make me leave the country, the Swede said. œI can promise you that I won™t.