If the above headline looks unwieldy, it beats “Red Rocket Slugged In Cockpit”. Nothing against Matt Bonner, but it was gonna take more than turning up for a Shearwater gig for the San Antonio garbage time maven to make another CSTB appearance first thing on a Monday morning. From the San Antontio Express-News’ Jeff “Notes & Chords Mean Nothing To Me” McDonald :

Strange moment in the fourth quarter of the Spurs’ 113-88 victory over Milwaukee tonight. Spurs forward Matt Bonner was out on the wing, in the flow of his team’s offense, when he suddenly and inexplicably bent over in obvious pain.

What happened?

Apparently, Milwaukee’s Royal Ivey sucker-punched him. Or, at the very least, shoved him.

Bonner says Ivey hit him so hard in the sternum so hard, it knocked the wind out of him. It seemed on odd place for Bonner to take a hit, considering he was about 28 feet from the basket and was no threat to score.

“I don’t know why he did it,” Bonner said.

Not long after Bonner was hurt, officials called an unrelated foul under the basket, allowing Bonner to catch his breath. He didn’t even have to leave the game.

It could have been worse. The way Bonner was hunched over, it appeared he got hit in a much, much more sensitive area than he actually did.