Of the Indians’ hopes of dumping 34 year-old 1B/RF Nick Swisher and the remaining 2 years/$30 million contractual commitment onto another club, Hardball Talk’s Craig Calcaterra notes there’s other considerations at play. Namely, Swisher’s crucial role in selecting the Governor of Brohio.

Where would you trade Swisher anyway? BroYork? Broladelphia? Broakland? Chicagbro? To the Baltimore Broioles? If you’re doing a challenge trade that might work as the Indians could get Ubaldbro Jimenez back, but they let him go a year ago for pete’s sake.

At this point I think it’d be hard to move Swisher. Especially with that contract. Maybe if he waived the $30 million he was owed and requested free agency he could persuade a team in Bropan to sign him. Like, say, the Hiroshima Broyo Carp. Or the Brokohama Bay Stars


There’s another option, however. Swisher could leave the money on the table, retire, and work pro b(r)ono alongside former Philadelphia Record Exchange co-owner turned Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame CEO Greg Harris on the museum’s upcoming “HOSE BEFORE BRO’S” exhibit.