(DeWayne Wise robbing Gabe Kapler of a 9th inning HR and preserving Buerhle’s perfecto — surely worthy of a presidential phone call, too?)

With apologies to Lloyd Bridges, Jim Parque picked the wrong day to confess PED use. The White Sox’s Mark Buerhle threw a perfect game against Tampa today, the first such accomplishment in the big leagues since Randy Johnson hurled one in May of 2004, and just the 18th of all time. The only thing that could make Buerhle’s feat more satisfying would be if we learned David Wells was hungover while watching something else on cable.