(Starting in place of the suspended Andrew Quarless, tight end Mickey Shuler has four catches and a touchdown for Penn State)

While Joe Paterno’s standard poormouth session before facing Florida International (“I am as nervous as I’ve probably ever been for a first game. This is going to be a very, very interesting opening game for us.”) appears to be unfounded (it’s 17-0), perhaps he should have lent that posture to his fellow Big 10 coach Lloyd Carr – late in the second quarter Appalachian State is leading at the Big House 21-14.

Ok, hold the phone — I was just about to say “it’s early,” and that a near-upset might be the best anyone can hope for on this super-boring first day of the season. But now it’s 28-14! If a Wolverine falls in Ann Arbor and no one can watch it on TV did it really happen?

Meanwhile, there might not be a better game than Colorado-CSU on FSN. It’s 14-14, with both sides moving up and down the field. It’s also the halftime show that I’ll be watching – since the Big 10 Network is a Fox co-venture, I’m expecting that they’ll have more highlights than the WWL.

Update: PSU now leads the worst team in the nation 24-0. The Nitts have all of 13 rushing yards, while the Golden Panthers have -5.

Update 2: It’s 17-14 Colorado down at Mile High. More impressively, Michigan returned a kickoff 25 yards to the 32, drove right down the field but then got held to just a field goal. 28-17 App. State at halftime.

Update 3: Oh yeah, and over on ESPN2 they’re stuck with Michigan State 45, Alabama-Birmingham 3.

Update 4: According to ESPN’s GameCast, Penn State’s Mickey Shuler has 413 receiving years, and Chad Henne is Northwestern’s quarterback. I am, however, pleased to see the Wildcats handling Northeastern 24-0, as they lost to D-1AA New Hampshire 51 weeks ago.Meanwhile, the Mountaineers who aren’t from Morgantown have opened with an interception, though again they kept it to a FG. 28-20 in Ann Arbor.