Deposed Arizona coach Dennis Green became an unwitting ‘net / yack radio fixture last season with a postgame rant for the ages following the Cards’ 4th quarter collapse against Da Bears last October.

Advertising Age’s Jeremy Mullman reports that Coors, not satisfied with killing Bill Walsh, hope to make Green their latest spokesmodel (link swiped from Lion In Oil)

Rough cuts of two early ads featuring Mr. Green’s press conferences don’t feature his famous outburst, but rather more innocuous quotes from tamer exchanges with the media. Why would Coors use a middling coach like Mr. Green (who posted a 16-32 record in three years at Arizona following a more successful stint in Minnesota best remembered for playoff disappointments) in a press-conference ad if it’s not going to use his definitive press conference?

The problem, according to people familiar with the matter, is that Mr. Green’s anger after the Monday night meltdown was so pyrotechnic that Coors and longtime agency DraftFCB are having a hard time crafting it into an ad that will pass the collective muster of Coors Chief Marketing Officer Andrew England, the NFL (which has veto power over ads as part of Coors’ sponsorship agreement), and Mr. Green himself.

Efforts to make an ad out of the rant are said to be continuing.

A spokeswoman said a third spot — intended to run later than the first two — was still in development but, as of late today couldn’t say definitely whether it would in fact feature the famed tirade.

One holdup may be Coors’ reluctance to directly challenge its competitors. For instance, the “crown their asses” bit from Mr. Green could, with little imagination, be used as a dig at the self-proclaimed “King of Beers” — Anheuser-Busch’s Budweiser. But Coors in recent years has eschewed a challenger strategy and instead focused on positioning itself as the coldest, “most refreshing” light beer.

Coors is also planning press-conference ads starring retired former Dallas Cowboys head coach Bill Parcells, a far more accomplished coach than Mr. Green also known for occasionally combative press-conference behavior. The new press conference ads begin airing Aug. 16.

I’m pretty sloppy with Final Cut, so perhaps I’ll leave this to the professionals, but if they can’t fashion a serviceable clip from Green’s infamous outburst, surely there’s some good Tom Coughlin footage available?