(University Of Oregon DL Ra’shon Harris struts his stuff for an audience of rich white guys and football degenerates watching on television)

Recently, yours truly disparaged the NFL Scouting Combine as “a meat market” , though Jeff Pearlman — never as smart or as good looking as when he’s echoing my sentiments — goes a bit further in likening the televised spectacle to a modern slave auction.  That Rich Eisen 40 yard dash doesn’t seem nearly so funny now, does it?

In short: (With rare exception) A bunch of old, wealthy white men sit in the stands with stopwatches, clocking (with rare exception) a bunch of young, inexperienced black men. The bidding takes place in April, with the most money spent earning the most promising (with rare exception) black man. In my radio friend™s words, œIt™s creepy. I agree.

Whenever I watch ESPN or the NFL Network and see their so-called œDraft experts, I think œI™d rather be a garbage man specifically in charge of used condom disposal than report on this shit. Seriously. You™re Mel Kiper. You™re 50-years old. You have a family, a life, hopes and dreams. And your days are spent, quite literally, chasing around 20-year-old kids to find out what their future plans are. You pitch a tent if they text you, and an even larger tent if they call to say, œHey, Mel, I™m going to Miami. It™s a sad existence, one I wouldn™t wish on my worst journalistic enemy.