It took a little bit of searching, but finally I’ve found a point of view less sophisticated than my own.

From the daily blog of the Baltimore Sun’s Roch Kubatko,

Keith Hernandez had a decent argument until he brought gender into it, which happened to be instantly. A massage therapist has no business in a major league dugout, male or female.

What’s going to happen in a game that requires a massage therapist to race onto the field? Is Brian Giles suddenly going to strip off his shirt, lay face-down in the outfield and ask to have a knot worked out of his neck? And exactly how long would umpires allow a game to be delayed for this?

I can just imagine Orioles head trainer Richie Bancells frantically asking if there’s a massage therapist in the house after Jeff Conine pulls up lame while running to first base.

Where do we draw the line? How about the guy who makes omeletes in the Orioles’ clubhouse before weekend games? You never know when a player might get hungry during the seventh-inning stretch.

If Daniel Cabrera keeps walking so many guys, snacks might actually become necessary. At least a juice box break. Fruit’s always nice, too. Some grapes, maybe