The following (terrifying) press release comes to us from Maury Brown’s Biz Of Baseball (thanks to Repoz for the link) :

EMI Music Marketing announced today the upcoming album “Music From The Mound” from Red Sox pitcher Daisuke Matsuzaka. EMI will distribute the album in the United States , Toshiba/EMI will distribute the album in Japan.

“Music From The Mound” features a compilation of Matsuzaka’s favorite and inspirational songs from various American, English and Japanese recording artists. The album also features the new original track “Gyro Ball”, which includes guest performances from former J. Geils harmonica player Magic Dick (above), former Extreme guitarist Nuno Bettencourt as well as Boston Red Sox television announcers Don Orsillo and Jerry Remy.

“I listen to both Japanese and English/American artists, and I enjoy a wide variety of music, especially Rock, Hip Hop and R&B,” said Matsuzaka. “I am excited to share my favorite inspirational songs with everyone in Red Sox nation and beyond. I’m also thrilled to work with the Red Sox Foundation, the official team charity of the Red Sox on this project.”

Nuno Bettencourt? Who knew Dice K was down with that Guitar Player magazine crud?  Who do up and coming guitarists Peter Gammons and Theo Epstein have to fuck to make their debuts on a Japanese-distributed title?

I do, however, realize this ill-conceived project was designed to benefit charities, and as such, I will try to concentrate on the positive. For instance, there’s no mention of Dickey Barrett having anything to do with this.