(that’s not a teleprompter flashing lyrics — Meat Loaf has Braden Looper on his fantasy baseball squad and now he’s praying for the end of time to hurry up and arrive.)
Jim Steinman’s former collaborator and master thespian (“Spice World”), the former Marvin Aday is interviewed by the New York Times’ James Diamos about his meaty fantasy sports addiction (thanks to Sam Frank for the link) :
Q. How many leagues are you in?
A. At this point, 18, but there will be more. I’ve had as many as 60. Last year, I was in 33 and I won 9.
Q. How do you prepare for a draft, and how much time do you spend on your leagues during the season?
A. Because it’s so deep, and there are usually 15 teams in a league, you really have to research to death. You’re like a G.M. at that point. When I’m not working, I have N.F.L. Sunday Ticket and I watch all the games. At the same time, I have my computer on, so I can monitor everything in real-time scoring. On Monday, I don’t do anything. Tuesday is the day you normally pick up free agents, and I spend several hours working on that. I listen to N.F.L. radio on Sirius. Sometimes I even do call-ins on N.F.L. radio with their fantasy football guru. Unless there is a Thursday game, by Friday, I have to set my lineups. Then you have to watch the injury reports on Saturday.
And on Sunday, I joined this Web site, where it’s nothing but injury reports, which they update every 15 minutes.
Q. LaDainian Tomlinson or Shaun Alexander?
A. That’s a tough one; a coin toss. With (San Diego tight end Antonio) Gates in camp, I would take Tomlinson. But Shaun Alexander is a great running back.
Q. Randy Moss or Terrell Owens?
A. You’d take Moss. Moss is a top 10 draft pick. Owens is in the second round now.
Q. Ron Dayne or Maurice Clarett?
A. I would take Maurice Clarett. I think there’s more upside. Ron Dayne you’ve seen play. Maurice Clarett, you haven’t seen him yet.
Q. Is drafting two good players out of three good enough in fantasy football?
A. Well, two out of three ain’t bad. (He laughs.) No. In fantasy football, you need depth. And you really need depth at running back, with weeks off and things like that. I would avoid quarterbacks, unless you can get Peyton Manning. And people are always picking kickers in the early rounds and they should be kicked.
The New York Post’s Phil Mushnick, of course, takes a dim view of this kind of activity, claiming that “many fantasy leaguers have a more grotesquely skewed view of games than do game-to-game gamblers.” Fantasy football is a gateway to hardcore gambling, ladies and gentlemen, much the way the New York Post is a gateway to a real newspaper.
1 thought on “Sage Draft Advice From Meat Loaf”
“Goddamn it, I can’t seem to remember where my ‘mansierre’ went.”
“For chrissakes, Meat, they’re hanging right there in front of you.”
“Oh, geez– thanks!”