(sorry, Stephon. I missed the boat on this one)

Yesterday, a few paragraphs from Brendan Haywood’s critique of Stephon Marbury’s recent U-Stream meltdown were excerpted in this space, though it seems Haywood left the most sensational commentary for a webcast on Hardcore Sports Radio.

As you’ve no doubt read elsewhere, Haywood compared Marbury’s U-Stream appearance to “gay porn” and insisted “there™s no way any other professional athletes would wanna get dressed around this guy, because you gotta think something is a little, he™s swinging from both sides of the fence.  Not like Mickey Mantle, presumably.

Scratching one’s skull at Starbury’s exhibitionism is one thing ;  outing the NBA’s Self-Proclaimed No. 1 Point Guard and condoning homophobia in the locker room is antother matter entirely.  Yahoo Sports’ Kelly Dwyer decries Haywood’s paranoia, calling the Wizards F, “pathetic…it’s as sad and pointless as Marbury’s ego-driven trip down Dementia Ave.”

Because Stephon isn’t leaning against the wall, grabbing some valuable appendage, sporting huge hunks of bling that would make Zsa Zsa Gabor blush ” the typical look for just about any NBA baller in any club over the last 15 years ” Haywood is freaked out. And because he’s never had to think about this sort of thing, weird = gay. Different = gay. Shirtless = gay. Stephon = gay.

Brendan, guess what? You’ve likely had a gay teammate, at some level, dressing around you since you started playing basketball. More than likely. Even more assured is the absolute fact that you’ve had a gay member of the media in the locker room after the game while you dress.

Somehow they’ve managed not to hit on you. Somehow they’ve managed to act … well, like you would in a situation like that. You think a gay man dressing near you is some sort of threat? Why? Do you flip out and start dry humping women at the beach when they pass by you in string bikinis? Do you think that typical levels of restraint and tact and human dignity fly out the window just because a person’s orientation is different than yours?

Not to diminish the seriousness of Dwyer’s point, but I do think it would be kind of funny if someone had so little self-control they tried dry humping women at the beach. But enough about Scott Skiles,  let’s hope Haywood issues what Chris Morris might call “a frank and full retratction of what he’s said”.