Wales 0, England 1 – Worth the $24.99 only if the satellite people were paying me. Really a toss up as to whose picture and sound quality were shittier today, DirectTV’s feed from Sky or a succession of NCAA football games via ESPN’s Game Plan package that could just as well have been beamed from Cardiff. Or Mars.

The old “tactically naive” insult commonly leveled at England could be replaced today by “tactically inept” — Sven’s chosen XI this morning were the biggest waste of collective talent since Hagar, Schon, Aaronson and Shrieve’s ‘Through The Fire’.

(Landon Donovan, modeling some dubious new back to school threads)

US 2, Mexico 0 – If you’re ranked 6th in the world, you’re supposed to qualify early. Seriously though, the charismatically challenged Bruce Arena has changed the culture surrounding the US National team duirng his tenure to the point where not only was this result expected, no opposition will take his side lightly in Germany next summer. That said, the majority of the globe’s media will either celebrate the US’ early elimination or point to a strong American showing as a sign the game is going to hell.

Arena’s best shot at garnering major coverage in his homeland has less to do with the World Cup results but rather whether or not he’s willing to re-enact one of Vince McMahon’ s more unfortunate decisions, with Kasey Keller playing the part of David Shultz and Jim Rome as John Stossel. Hey, a guy can dream, right?

Though I’ll note the Metrostars managed a late draw with the Wizards, what is up with MLS having a full slate of fixtures on the same evening the US team is playing on national TV (ok, ESPN Classic)? Bad enough the fledgling league has to settle for whatever handful of viewers aren’t watching NCAA football, the baseball pennant races or the US Open, but going head to head with US v. Mexico was insane.

Scotland 1, Italy 1 – Francesco Totti helped the Azzuri get out of jail with seconds to spare, though I am relying on rumor. Setanta’s feed disappeared with 20 minutes left and Scotland leading 1-0. Not paying the satellite bill will be this month’s act of civil disobedience.