Dallas barely got past the winless Bengals yesterday at Texas Stadium, and while the Morning News’ Tim Colishaw has issues with QB Tony Romo’s performance (“Dallas won in spite of having the NFC East’s fourth-best quarterback at the controls”), You Go Live In Utah’s Amanda Cobra takes greater umbrage at Romo’s post game remarks (“I can’t remember the last time I was this infuriated by a player’s comments. Seriously, Josh Howard can wipe his ass with the Constitution while goosestepping through a temple on Rosh Hashanah and I don’t think I would be this upset”)
“I’m pretty sure we won the ballgame.”
“If you never turn the ball over, you not going to be that good.”
“You’d love to never have a turnover, but that’s unrealistic.”
“I’m sorry that I’m not sorry that we won.”
Tones, you cannot possibly be as sorry as I am now. All the fun that everyone has had at your expense over your non-football related romantic adventures or your ill-timed vacations should be nothing compared to the wrath you might soon experience from Cowboys fans. It’s funny to give you guff about your sophomoric tastes in women and houses. But at least after all the teasing was done, all Cowboys fans knew that you were humbled by the fact that, by all accounts, you should be giving golf lessons, living in a one bedroom apartment in Carrolton and driving a late model Jeep. But instead you are the millionaire quarterback for the Dallas fucking Cowboys. Wow. And you didn’t take that for granted. The last thing you would do is give a big shrug and “meh” to an obviously substandard performance. You clearly would respond to such a situation by reassuring Cowboys fans that you realize that you did not perform particularly solidly and let them know that you were determined to fix the streakiness of your performance over the past two weeks. So, with our confidence in you collectively restored, you would continue to practice hard and come home and knock back a few Lime Cactus Michelob Ultras and watch Happy Gilmore again.
But instead, you think there was nothing wrong with yesterday’s game. A win’s a win. They can’t all be pretty. At the end of the day, there’s a W next to us. At the end of the season, you just remember which games you won and which games you lost. Guess what? I think that is bullshit and you know it. Whether or not you choose or care to acknowledge it is your call. But if you are totally happy with your performance and nearly losing to the winless Bengals, you deserve every bit of bad press and Papa Joe jokes that can be thrown your way. I don’t care how many stranded motorists you help or how many Pepsi rewards points you have, you are either delusional or don’t care if you are unwilling to admit that you have not performed well over the past two weeks. It’s not in your contract that you must humbly genuflect in front of Cowboys fans and ask them to keep their faith in you. But your new logic that somehow turnovers mean that you are a better team? Wow.