(above : just Whipple being Whipple)

Manny Ramirez, supposedly suffering from a sore right knee, won’t be a participant in tonight’s Yankees/Red Sox encounter. Porfolio’s Franz Lidz is amongst those predicting Manny’s days in a Sox uniform are numbered, suggesting last week’s outburst to the Boston Herald was the most ill-advised stunt in the left-fielder’s long career. Topped only by this, however :

I once asked a prominent relief pitcher to describe the most idiotic thing he had witnessed in the big leagues. “That’s easy,” he said, and launched into the story of a former teammate”an All-Star outfielder”who refused to use toilet paper. A clubhouse attendant supplied the player with a daily ration of hand towels, which, when soiled, would be flushed.

One afternoon the reliever came in from batting practice to find the locker room awash in frantic maintenance workers. When he asked a plumber what all the fuss was about, he was told that a washcloth-clogged toilet had overflowed and was threatening to submerge the bathroom stalls. “Of all the dumb stuff I’ve seen that particular outfielder do,” the stopper told me, “that was the dumbest.”

That particular outfielder was, of course, Manny Ramirez.