Bummer, right? The Orlando Sentinel follows an earlier ESPN report of a pending NCAA investigation of former Florida C Maurkice “Savage Pencil” Pouncey receiving $100K from an agent, the sort of thing that could result in a felony charge against the snake in question according to aspiring Bore-ass Darren Heitner. Heitner — a self-styled legend amongst agencies repping lower tier pro bowlers and Maxim model wannabes — cites a potential 15 year prison sentence for the aforementioned crime, which seems awfully severe given Darren’s fiendish use of hair care products shoulda resulted in a life term behind bars a very long time ago.
Lest you start punching the sky in anticipation of USC-esque sanctions being levied against Urban Meyer, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution’s Jeff Schulz warns the most that will probably come of this is a forfeit of Florida’s Sugar Bowl victory over Cincinnati (“so much for the parade in Athens”)
Barring the NCAA finding Florida in violation of other allegations, the only way the Gators get slapped with a more significant penalty than vacating one win is if the NCAA finds that Florida knowingly used an illegal player in the Sugar Bowl. That issue was at the root of USC™s two-year probation with Reggie Bush. The difference is, Bush™s reported benefits took place over a series of several months, including his family living rent-free in a home that was provided by a sports marketing representative. The NCAA determined that the Trojans must have been aware of benefits Bush was receiving over a long period of time.
If Pouncey took $100,000 from the agent in the time frame that has been outlined, the NCAA would have to prove that Florida became aware of it after the SEC championship (Dec. 5) and before the Sugar Bowl (Jan. 1), a period of four weeks (some of which was a holiday break for players). It doesn™t seem likely the NCAA could prove that ” nor does it seem plausible that coach Urban Meyer would care enough to cover up allegations of one player taking money from an agent for the sake of one bowl game that didn™t have national championship ramifications.
Could you explain to me what the greatest snake is, my brother thinks it can be a boa constrictor.