Responding to a MetsBlog item raising the spectre of D-Backs D-Bag Eric Byrnes being shopped to the Mets, Hot Foot‘s Anthony De Rosa declares, “if there is a chance to get him the Mets should be looking to make a deal.”
He the epitome of what we here at Hot Foot stand for and look for in our players which is intensity, an ability not to take oneself too seriously, and a pure love of the game. He also fits the mold of the type of player the Mets lack, someone who will be a vocal leader and motivate the guys who lead more by example when the chips are down.
He™s the hard nosed clubhouse general with a healthy sense of humor that the Mets need. I think he would fit in to the Mets clubhouse perfectly and his media savvy make him a gold mine in New York.
Much as I hate to take issue with Mr. De Rosa, let there be no mistake — a mental midget like Eric Byrnes would be about as welcome an addition to the NYC sporting scene as Paul Lo Duca at your daughter’s high school prom. That this sickening master of self-promotion/absorbtion would provide a tonic to NYC’s legion of non-Spanish speaking working media cannot be argued, but if it’s comic relief the Mets require, there’s ample amounts to go around in the manager’s office (to say nothing of the television broadcast booth). Given the Mets glaring weaknesses in the bullpen (if not the back end of the starting rotation), do they really want to take on the remaining $25 million owed to Byrnes — who played in all of 50 games in ’08 — over the next two seasons?
Byrnes has been called “The Crash Test Dummy”. While his boosters would have you believe that’s got something to do with his tendency to run head-first into brick walls, I’d prefer to think he’s being compared to the Winnipeg band of the same name. Like the group that brought you the 1993 single, “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm”, he’s compelling for about 15 seconds, but quickly becomes such a nuisance that most right thinking persons would just as stab themselves (or him) in the eyes then tolearate another moment of his presence.
Given the Mets glaring weaknesses in the bullpen (if not the back end of the starting rotation), do they really want to take on the remaining $25 million owed to Byrnes — who played in all of 50 games in ‘08 — over the next two seasons?
Someone’s gotta take Moises Alou’s roster spot, right?
I think this deal becomes rather palatable if it really is a straight up Castillo for Byrnes kind of thing, as floated in the MetsBlog post. Though I have no idea why the D-Backs would take Louis the Hobbled instead of resigning Orlando Hudson. Am I missing something here?
On the other hand, I don’t think Byrnes would repeat his career (read: barely above average) year from 2006, and for all his intensity and intangibles, I remember him being the moron who thought he touched home plate, took the time to shove Jason Varitek while walking back to the dugout and was then tagged out in a 2003 playoff game.
He’s the worst. Which is to say that I’d rather see Karim Garcia come back than see Byrnes with the Mets. If only because I don’t know for sure just how dim Garcia’s political views are. Even for Castillo, who has to be dealt somewhere, I think Byrnes wouldn’t be much of a haul. I’d rather a middling double-A pitching prospect from the Cubs, honestly. For all the insinuations from the talk-radio meatballs, it’s the braying, shit-stirring “what a character” white dudes (Wags, LoDuca, Johnny Fuckface if you want to go way back) who seem to cause the most clubhouse discord for the Mets, not those showboatin’ latins.
Also: only people named Dave are allowed to comment on this. Sorry, Pork and Beans guy.
I dunno, I’d welcome Pork and Beans if only because I feel left out of the internet cock size challenge.
I’ll give you that whitey often seems to screw up the clubhouse in Met land more often than our allegedly lazy Latin contingent. However, I’ll take the first opportunity to get rid of Castillo, especially if it means opening up a run at Hudson and deal with the consequences later. But re: Byrnes’ political views, did I miss some Schilling-esque outburst in his past? Surely he can provide a more cogent answer than Sarah Palin as to what media he reads and what Supreme Court rulings he disagrees with.
I can’t seem to find it now — after doing a bunch of really embarrassing searches for the post, including “eric byrnes ‘grease some a-rabs'” — but Byrnes popped off with some predictably bullshit Bushian stuff a year or so back, before such views became the province of Hugh Hewitt, Curt Schilling and no one else.
And I’m obviously under no illusions that, say, Daniel Murphy is reading “Shock Doctrine” or that anyone on any sports team I care about is someone I’d want to hang out with. But Byrnes just seems so corny — and so overrated — that it’d make me pretty bummed to see him in a Mets uniform; I kind of feel like there are maybe a dozen less expensive, less offensive dudes who could do what he (or Church) do in 500 ABs. At least Xavier Nady’s just-this-side-of-mediocre numbers didn’t come with a side order of hair product and a threadbare johnny-hustle/Captain America rep. Anyway, plenty of dudes can bellyflop in the outfield. Those who played softball with me this summer can attest I did it often, if only seldom on purpose.
And Palin…man, Kaz Matsui can articulate his views on the Supreme Court more eloquently than she can, without his translator. We’ll see how she does tomorrow night (maybe these last three weeks have been an elaborate exercise in expectation-depression), but I have a feeling that the results will be Heilman-caliber wince-inducing.
The problem is that the electorate loves those folksy I-don’t-know-shit-about-politics politicians and she’s at the top of the food chain for those people. She’s porn for the types of people who don’t understand the issues (in other words, for most swing states).