…why not hire the guy who has ordered covert assassinations and/or secret bombing campaigns in half the world’s countries to coordinate your efforts? At the very least, Henry Kissinger is a recognizable brand — one that kills your democratically elected leader and installs a junta of crypto-fascists backed by fruit corporations or whatever, but a brand nonetheless. And considering that Alexei Lalas was probably in the running for some advisory role or other, maybe Hammering Hank’s role on the committee seeking to bring the World Cup to the U.S. in 2018 or 2022 makes some sense? And, to be fair, Kissinger was a part of the committee that actually brought the ’94 World Cup to the U.S., so maybe…no, actually it’s still pretty offensive. The AP, via ESPN, reports:

“I don’t think we have a huge chance in 2018. I think it will probably go to Europe,” Kissinger said Monday. “We’ll certainly contest for it. And just as ’86 guaranteed that we got it in 94, so I think bidding for 2018 will give us a great chance for 2022.”

…FIFA’s executive committee will vote on the 2018 and 2022 hosts in December 2010, and many think the 2018 vote will come down to England or Spain. Kissinger thinks Russia, which has never hosted soccer’s showcase, will get strong consideration. Next year’s tournament is in South Africa, and Brazil will stage the World Cup in 2014.

“I think Europe will probably get it in 2018,” he said. “Our best shot is ’22, but I hope we can get it in ’18. But it’s hard to believe Europe will let it go three times in a row.”

Kissinger received FIFA’s order of merit in 1996, with the governing body saying his “support for football from the high-profile position of his public office has contributed greatly to raising its visibility and credibility in the United States.”

Kissinger grew up in Fuerth, Germany, and still pays attention to Germany’s national team, die Deutsche Nationalmannschaft. “I follow them and I wish them well, but I don’t feel about them like I do about the Yankees,” he said. He also roots for Juventus, because he is friendly with the Agnelli ownership group, and Manchester United and Arsenal.

He also roots for the oppressive crypto-corporatist Chinese government, because he is friendly with its leaders, and resigned his spot on the 9/11 Commission because he preferred not to reveal the extent to which his consulting company does business with essentially every bad government in existence. Of course he loves the freaking Yankees. Thanks to Brendan Flynn for the link.