(Carlos Zambrano, pictured, is MRI-bound)

As predicted in this space, the Cardinals blew another one to the the Kansas City Royals today, 3-2. Yadier Molina will miss at least one more game tomorrow, although La Russa promises to risk this young man’s career if a game is on the line. “If we had a chance to win a game, I could run Yadi back there,” La Russa told the St. Louis Dispatch‘s Rick Hummel. What wasn’t predicted in this space is that the Cubs would drop a second to Tampa Bay, 5-4. Then, as the Trib’s Paul Sullivan reports, both Zambrano and Jim Edmonds left the field hurt (with Reed Johnson still benched from yesterday’s collision at 1B). With such depressing news on the field, I always know I can turn to Sulivan’s boss and Cub owner Sam Zell for some comic relief. In this case, the hiring of a female executive at Tribco was occasion for some fun. The octogenarian Zell pulled out some vintage Playboy party jokes when he decided to pen the following huh-larious press release in welcoming aboard Ms. Kim Johnson, excerpted here, who I believe Zell refers to as a “career gal.” Link swiped from Jeff Bercovici’s Mixed Media:

œI thought I was entering a contest to win tickets to a Guns N’ Roses reunion show, but an invite to this party is even better, said Johnson. œThe ˜new™ Tribune is revolutionizing content, sales, and promotion”this is the place to be right now. We™re utilizing our brands and serving our audiences in exciting new ways and we want creative and successful sales professionals to join us!

Johnson is a resident of Florida, and a former waitress at œKnockers -The Place for Hot Racks and Cold BrewsAsked if she feels ready to accept the new challenge, Johnson said, œI once won a contest at the restaurant up-selling shots to guys who asked for beer”how different can this be?