Noting the epidemic of fishy goings-on in the world of racquet sports, the Washington Post’s Norman Chad wondered this past monday, “Who exactly is betting on all these tennis matches?”  I dunno, someone who knows they’re fixed?

In my sordid, quasi-adult life, I have bet on football, basketball, baseball, poker, blackjack, roulette and the occasional marriage. I have even tipped a keno runner. But it has never occurred to me to lay a red cent on tennis.

In addition, I know several reputable and disreputable gambling types – fellows who would wager on the length of a priest’s sermon – and none of them has ever called a bookie and said, “Psst – give me two dimes on Elena Dementieva in Prague.”

Amongst those suspended was suspended was Giorgio Galimberti (above), ranked 1,009th in the world with a 9-21 career record.

To me, his gambling excesses are understandable – what’s he supposed to do when he loses in the first round, hang around the hospitality room for free sparkling water? Trust me, if he’s in town the rest of the week, he is likely either hooker-bound or bookie-bound. And when choosing between those two vices, I always lean toward the latter, for I cannot recall a single time I ever left a prostitute with more money in my pocket than I brought.