The latest Dane Cook star vehicle, “My Best Friend’s Girl” opens tonight, and while the alleged comedian stars alongside Kate Hudson and the lucky-to-be-working Jason Biggs, Sons Of Steve Garvey casts a shadow over Chavez Ravine with the grim warning, “the Dodgers have never won a home game on the opening day of a Dane Cook-acted movie.”   America’s movie goers, Greg Maddux, everyone’s a loser today.

This is true for the opening day of every movie in which Cook has been listed as an “actor” (and we use this liberally); the Dodgers are 2-5 overall with both wins coming on the road; and with the Dodgers at home hosting the Giants tonight, well, let’s just say the Dane Cook Dodgers Curse (TM) is almost too much to bear.

The data:

Dane Cook Movie    Release date    Dodgers result

Buddy    June 6, 1997    L vs. STL, 1-3
Flypaper    July 18, 1997    L @ ATL, 1-4
Mystery Men    Aug 6, 1999    L @ NYM, 1-2
Simon Sez    Oct 29, 1999    DNP
The Touch    Aug 1, 2002    L @ CIN, 4-6
Stuck On You    Dec 12, 2003    DNP
Torque    Jan 16, 2004    DNP
Mr. 3000    Sept 17, 2004    W @ COL, 8-6
Waiting¦    Oct 7, 2005    DNP
London    Feb 12, 2006    DNP
Employee of the Month    Oct 6, 2006    DNP
Mr. Brooks    June 1, 2007    W @ PIT, 5-4
Good Luck Chuck    Sept 21, 2007    L @ AZ, 3-12
Dan In Real Life    Oct 26, 2007    DNP
My Best Friend™s Girl    Sept 19, 2008    ?????

SoSG has tried to interview Dodger players about the Dane Cook Dodgers Curse (TM), but most of the players declined comment on the record (off the record, one of the players planned to see the 10a showing at Arclight, if anyone is interested in joining him). The only person who commented on the record was KABC broadcaster Charley Steiner, who said, “Dane Cook Dodgers Curse? Hogwash. The Dodgers are going to score 25 runs tonight and win the game handily.”