As if the recent lack of tournament appearances and the three-part Washington Post series wasn’t enough for the University of Maryland, sex columnist Dan Savage recently appeared there, and, well, I believe one UM student has inadvertently helped him think up a new one for the Cameron Crazies:

Fear the Turtle: What a woman experiences when she realizes halfway through vaginal intercourse that her bowels are full and her enjoyment of the sex has been superseded by her fear of crapping the bed. “Sue had to ask Drew to stop fucking her because she feared the turtle. She got on the can for a minute, then hopped back in bed, and no longer feared the turtle.”