Yesterday’s evisceration of the Washington secondary
aside, I suspect Dallas QB Tony Romo really has it coming to him when You Go Live In Utah’s Amanda pleads, “please stop playing into every stereotype of what a vapid jock does when money and fame come his way.”

What next? Maybe start betting on games? Ooooooooh, everyone LOVES a good DUI. You’ve probably already put in the order for the sweet custom Hummer (no, not that kind though with the way you’re going….) with the bangin’ system on which you can listen to all your favorite Journey hits. It may be too late. You may already be too far down the path of least resistance. That makes me sad.

I will give you that with Matt Leinart and Tom Brady both bailing on pregnant girlfriends for models or mildly retarded socialites, the bar is pretty low. But when you are making Tom Brady look kind of smart and classy, it’s time to put down the Absolut Pear-tini and find the quietest corner of the Ghostbar and have a little think. Look out into the sea of ochre-colored sharks and cougars that surround you. Decide if this is really the kind of dude you are. It’s not too late to get out. Just be careful to not slip in any of those puddles of hair gel, glitter bronzer, melted silicon or fame-hungry desperation on your way out. I get that you’re still kind of new to Dallas and everything. If you really don’t know of anywhere else to go other than Ghostbar, let me offer some alternative choices. Maybe try The Old Monk, The Idle Rich, Dubliner, Doublewide, Vickery Park, the newly opened Capital Pub. They’re nice places that don’t have a heavy glaze of shame and baby oil coating the entire bar and its’ patrons.

PS – After writing this and going back to google to do an image search for “Ghostbar Dallas”, one of the first ten results is a picture of you, Tony Romo. You are now the poster child for the Ghostbar. Jebus! I give up. Have fun. Do a shot of Patron off a dead hooker’s ass for me, buddy.