And not just because I almost rented a film co-starring Scarlett Johansson and Darius Miles.

No, my friends. There are far more terrifying options. Val Kilmer IS Moses. (Or, he was). “Ten Commandments : The Musical” IS a digital versatile disc available right now for your purchase or rental. And no matter how poorly received the stage version might’ve been, the results of this inspired combination have been documented for all time. Long after Val Kilmer’s detractors have left this mortal coil, his most triumphant moment since “Top Secret!” will live on and on.