Though Esquire’s Scott Rabb happily points out “in 17 at bats, Cap’n Clutch accounted for 18 Yankees outs,” he saves some of his most severe criticism for annoying fixture / Irish tenor Ronan Tynan (link swiped from Repoz and Baseball Think Factory).
Why Bud Selig lets the Yankees turn the 7th-inning stretch into a faux-patriotic ritual — not so incidentally forcing the opposing pitcher to wait an extra five or so minutes while the microcephalic Ronan Tynan (above) quavers his meandering way through “God Bless America” — is a mystery. No other team or town pulls this sort of crap. It’s no tribute to America — it’s a tribute to George Steinbrenner’s sense of entitlement and his monomania, and it’s a disgrace to the game. If another team pulled this on the Yankees, Steinbrenner would raise hell, and he’d be absolutely right to do so. And if the Yanks’ pitchers could miss bats the way Tynan misses notes, the Yanks might’ve had a prayer against the Tribe.
And that’s all the gloating I intend to do. There are Clevelanders like Steinbrenner — whose idea of manhood is bullyragging, boasting, and buying respect — but most of us know that sportsmanship means winning and losing with as much dignity, perspective, and grace as one can muster.
In other words, fuck the motherfucking Yankees. In their house. With Paul Byrd. With Joe Borowski. With Rudy Giuliani in his precious little VIP box. With Rocket pouting, his feet up in the trainer’s table’s stirrups, as the team gynecologist pries apart his Hall of Fame labia. With the dickweed Michael Kay babbling about how the Yankees are the better team.
Wow, that GYN reference was incredibly vulgar. I guess you assume that no women read this blog, and fuck ’em if they do.
I generally presume that whoever reads this blog — male or female — is sophisticated enough to understand the difference between a passage I’ve quoted and one I’ve written myself.
I’m also hopeful that the majority of the readers understand that my quoting from another publication, is not necessarily intended as endorsement of the viewpoint expressed. If I have to spell that out on each and every occasion, this is gonna become a very tiresome process.
Perhaps Mr. Raab and his editors presume Esquire has no women readers. Whether you wish to take this up with them, is entirely up to you.
Ronan Tynan is the best thing to happen to Yankees’ haters everywhere. Doesn’t Raab realize that as long as Tynan keeps singing at the Stadium, the Yanks will NEVER win another series. It’s no coincidence that the series victory drought started in 2001 – the very same year Tynan was tapped by Steingrabber to cash in on the emotions of New Yorkers.
The cameras caught Josh Beckett cursing in a game last month when he trotted out to the mound between innings and then the sound of the ghost up in the booth announced God Bless America. It was pretty awesome. Color me shocked that Michael Kay didn’t use that as an excuse to tear the entire Sox organization a new one. I’m pretty sure he didn’t see Beckett’s reaction or there would’ve been plenty of choice commentary from that bozo. The Yankees chocked away another post-season. God bless America, indeed.