Jason Cohen calls our attention to this morning’s entry by the Philadelphia Inquirer’s Frank Fitzpatrick, in which the columnist delivers a punch line we’ve not yet heard (“The recent book in which basketball player John Amaechi, a former Penn Stater and New York Knick, says he’s homosexual provided a two-pronged revelation. Until its publication, no one had heard of either a gay NBA player or Penn State basketball.”) and another that’s just a bit tired (“Is it just me or does Ohio State freshman phenom Greg Oden look as if he’s about 42 years old?”). However, here’s the part I really liked.

Did you see the photo of that obscene blue monstrosity in yesterday’s Inquirer?Who drove it to Florida, George Patton?

What sort of misguided machismo would prompt someone to (a) manufacture, (b) sell, or (c) drive a completely impractical, gas-guzzling behemoth that is roughly the size of a 747?

Is it some sort of compensation device for the confidence-deprived? Do owners really believe these steroid-enhanced vehicles imply masculinity instead of stupidity?

Then again, Jon Lieber probably needs a pickup that large for all the off-season hauling he does to supplement his paltry income.

Frankly, rather than riding around Florida in that mechanical embarrassment, the overweight Phillies pitcher might want to consider a bicycle.