While the rest of you undiscriminating types were watching “America’s Ballroom Challenge”, Vlad’s Home Run Derby victory, I was entertained last night by SNY’s coverage of the Brooklyn Cyclones’ 3-2 home loss to the Jamestown Jammers. It was “Irish Heritage Night” at Keyspan Park, which might explain the outrageous outfit donned by Brooklyn starter Dillion Gee (above).
With the Mets having the night off, WFAN covered the game, with the dulcet tones of alleged CSTB reader Chris Carlin describing the action. While Carlin showed tremendous initiative by inviting Coney Island legend Von LMO to visit the booth during the 7th inning, the decision to play the above video over the Keyspan scoreboard might result in a very large class action suit against the Wilpon family.
Of the public animus towards the Sultan Of Surly, Sir John Kruk angrily stated today, “they’re booing greatness. You don’t boo a .200 hitter.” Great news, for Julio Lugo, then.
Of Matt Holiday and Alex Rios’ performances last night, Dusty Baker suggested the pair “might become household names….even though they play in obscure places.” How tight must those wristbands be, to consider Toronto an obscure place?
Perhaps Dusty has been talking to Joe Benigno, who I recently heard call the Chicago White Sox a “small market team.”
Good thing people who utter that ridiculous phrase don’t ever look at the Census Bureau’s website because if they went by actual population figures, they’d have to start calling Boston a ‘small market team’ due to its relative size to markets such as San Diego and Miami. But I guess baseball’s split between bozos who repeat inaccurate phrases that they learned from watching the bozos whom they replaced and rhetorical nitpicking loser bloggers like FJM who inconsistently use different stats to supposedly disprove said bozos. This game is better with the sound turned off.
I’m sure that the impressive runner-up showing should definitely help Rios’ “NOW” rating. If only I could remember if he’s in the Ruth or the Ali region, as those are probably very tough brackets on which to advance.
my fave part of “who’s now?” is the way that every time a challenger from the world of, i dunno, soccer, swimming, Xtreme spurts, etc., Keyshawn, Wilbon and the other stooge start banging on about “but is it a sport?” or “I’ve never heard of this guy”, etc.
I mean, the segments are embarrassing enough as is. But maybe they require judges who are, uh, a little more NOW?
yeah, the “who’s now” segments drive me up the wall; can this shit be dumbed down even further? But even I must admit the intro segment with the virtual viewer walking through a _Tron_-like virtual highlight montage, is an even greater special effect than the stock-footage-to-real-actor-footage in _The Bronx is Burning_ or the sublime casting of Sizemore as Pete Rose. But the shit usually gets switched off prior to seeing what color tie has been paired with which chaulk-guaged pinstripe suit and Byrnesesque waxy hair product, or which champion body surfer dating Cameron Diaz will lose in a popular text message vote to Lebron James. Life imitates dogfood.
“the virtual viewer walking through a _Tron_-like virtual highlight montage”
thanks. I was trying to think of a way of describing said sequence…though in all honesty, I’ve seen it ten times and I really couldn’t figure out what the fuck was going on.
For your reference, all of the intriguing first round matchups:
The Complete Bracket
MICHAEL JORDAN REGION
July 1: (1) Tiger Woods def. (8) Matt Leinart (90% – 10%)
July 2: (4) Dwyane Wade def. (5) Shaun White (73% – 27%)
July 3: (2) LaDainian Tomlinson def. (7) David Beckham (50.8% – 49.2)
July 4: (3) Steve Nash def. (6) Serena Williams (57% – 43%)
MUHAMMAD ALI REGION
July 5: (1) Peyton Manning def. (8) Amanda Beard (80.5% – 19.5%)
July 6: (4) Dale Earnhardt Jr. def. (5) Chuck Liddell (61.7% – 38.3%)
July 7: (2) Alex Rodriguez def. (7) Terrell Owens (67.5% – 32.5%)
July 8: (3) Kobe Bryant def. (6) Ronaldinho (60.8% – 39.2%)
BILLIE JEAN KING REGION
July 9: (1) LeBron James vs (8) Kelly Slater
July 10: (4) Jeff Gordon vs (5) Barry Bonds
July 11: (2) Derek Jeter vs (7) Sidney Crosby
July 12: (3) Reggie Bush vs (6) Danica Patrick
BABE RUTH REGION
July 13: (1) Tom Brady vs (8) David Ortiz
July 14: (4) Maria Sharapova vs (5) Vince Young
July 15: (2) Roger Federer vs (7) Tony Parker
July 16: (3) Shaquille O’Neal vs (6) Michael Phelps
OK, I’ll bite. Who is this “Tiger Woods”, and is golf a sport?
I mean no disrespect to all of CSTB’s hardcore swimming fans when I say it looks like Shaq got a bye into round 2.