A: The American Public (apologies to D. Letterman)

(only one of these men played the title character in “The Jerk”)

From Pat Yasinskas, in Thursday’s Charlotte Observer.

It took nearly three years, but Keyshawn Johnson got a heavy weight off his chest before Monday night’s game with Tampa Bay.

Johnson said he had a long-awaited conversation with ESPN commentator Joe Theismann in a television production meeting.

“The guy called me an idiot a couple of years ago when I was de-activated in Tampa,” Johnson said. “I just told him that’s not acceptable. I’m a guy with a degree from the University of Southern California. Idiots don’t get degrees. Especially when you don’t know what transpired within the organization, I’d just assume you would keep your mouth shut, because the next time that I’m an idiot on national television, I’m not going to be so nice. That was pretty much the conversation.”

Johnson said he told Theismann his problems in Tampa weren’t solely his fault. Johnson had a well-publicized feud with coach Jon Gruden that led to his de-activation and his eventual trade to Dallas.

“The whole Tampa situation, I knew good and well that I had something to do with that,” Johnson said. “But, at the same time, there was a guy (Gruden) who had something to do with it, too. Don’t try to put it all on me.”

Cathy Lee Crosby’s got your back, Keyshawn. Joe’s such a judgemental guy.