From today’s Barry Bonds press conference in Scottsdale, AZ.

“I have probably have gotten the best relationship with fans through all of this than I ever have through all of my career. I’ve traveled all over the place, ‘Barry keep your head up,’ ‘Barry, we’re behind you.’…things that I have always wanted….to come over to me and shake my hand and say ‘you know what? Who cares, you’re a good ballplayer, you’ve proved it. You’ve done this, you’ve done that, we’re all supporting you.’ I’ve never heard that before.”

“You guys are like re-running stories. This is old stuff. It’s like watching ‘Sanford and Son.’ It’s almost comical, basically. … Are you guys jealous, upset, disappointed, what?”

(What does a cheap hotel have in common with cheap underwear? That’s right, no ballroom).

I seem to recall another Bay Area sportsman, OJ Something, insisting once upon a time that he couldn’t walk down the street without well-wishers trying to hug him to death.

Writes Maura Johnston,

Some reporter asked Bonds an inaudible question, and Bonds answered:

“I don’t know, because I’d never let you in my house.”