I’m a calm, happy, person with a healthy sense of perspective. So I shall put the enormity of the Mets’ 5-4, 11 inning defeat to the Yankees into some sort of context for those of you who really don’t give a hoot about such things.

Imagine if you’ve prepared a lovely steak dinner (note to Bob Barker and/or Morrisey : substitute something that wasn’t running around if you prefer). Midway through the meal, the doorbell or the telephone rings, and when you return to the dinner table, it seems your cat has vomited all over your plate.

(Pedro, meet Billy).

Is such an unfortunate occurance a major tragedy? Does it mean you love the cat any less? Of course not. Especially if you owe the cat another $40 million guaranteed dollars.

It does mean, however, that you’ll approach future occasions with a little more trepidation and quite possibly question the judgement of whoever thought it was a good idea to bring this animal into your home (even if you thought it was a good idea at the time).

Boston’s Josh Beckett has allowed a solo HR to the Phillies’ Chase Utley this evening, as Philadelphia holds a 1-0 advantage. More offensively, Beckett is wearing a fielder’s mitt manufactured by Reebok. This is an aesthetic crime right up there with playing a Martha Stewart guitar or driving an automobile produced on the American Apparel assembly line.