From today’s CSTB junk mailbag :

IN MEMORY OF HOCKEY

In response to the many listener’s calls ranging from outrage at the players and the league, to sadness at the loss of their favorite sport we will hold vigil for the FANs to mark the demise of the hockey season. WFAN will conduct a memorial service tomorrow in hopes of providing some light-hearted relief.

The “memorial procession,” led by a hearse carrying WFAN’s Joe Benigno (above) and Sid Rosenberg, will depart at 1pm from the WFAN studios and end at Ben Benson’s Steakhouse, 123 W. 52nd St. (between 6th and 7th) in Manhattan. All fans are welcome to attend the ceremony to share their grief over the untimely death of their sport. This ceremony will be open casket and FANs are encouraged to bring their hockey memorabilia and or unused game tickets and officially bury the season. WFAN radio personalities will deliver eulogies in memoriam of the game, and a giant sympathy card will be available for fans to sign.

Writes Jon Solomon ,

I love how “listener “is singular in the first sentence.

Indeed, I would’ve thought Benigno’s ratings had improved upon moving to the afternoon, not stayed the same.