(Clint Hurdle, testifying there were two bags of deer meat at the bottom of the stairs)

The Rocky Mountain News’ Bernie Lincicome
, pointing out that some ballplayers have “faith in urine as a hand cream”, is hesistant to make too much of the Colorado Rockies’ alleged Mission From God.

The flurry of denials of a national story depicting the Rockies as good people is maybe the strangest disclaimer ever. Decency be damned, to paraphrase, the Rockies are as seedy as the next guy.

This is covering all the bases, just in case propriety goes into a slump.

Nowhere in baseball’s constitution – nor, in fact, is there a baseball constitution – does it require a separation of church and stats.

What an odd combination of elements are the Rockies, the altitude, the humidor and the holy . . .

Here’s how this thing gets legs. Rockies were bad. Rockies are better. Why?

The publication responsible for finding out is the same sheet that, when putting out its preseason projections, ignored the Rockies altogether. From disregard to hallucination, USA Today now considers it even.

And what an insult it is to the Rockies, and how superficial of Dan O’Dowd and Charlie Monfort to allow the notion, or for Clint Hurdle to reinforce it, since it means there is no design to their design but merely spiritual indulgence.

And here we thought it was home-growing the future, or whatever the latest plan was. All along it was something much more pious.

The Mariners’ Adrian Beltre tells the Seattle Times’ Bob Finnigan that he’s unaware of any steroid allegations aimed at himself. I realize this blog isn’t nearly as popular as the one with all the hazing pics, but it really hurts to be reminded repeatedly.